JusMare

life...

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

got back from the cottage last night...i guess you could say it was an eye opening experience
the weekend started off well when i got so intoxicated that i fell asleep at 11pm the first night we were up.
the next night adam came up and everything was great...may it have been because he was drunk? i didn't think so
all day on Sunday him and i didn't really get along...he made smart ass remarks and then tried to pawn them off as "babe i was just joking...i can't believe you didn't get it"
I think I know the difference between a joke and a remark made intentionally to get under my skin
I guess you learn a lot about a person given you put them in the right situation
His was a remote location in the middle of nowhere surrounded with his friends
why do guys act so differently around their friends? Family?
I think the question is...why do guys treat you so damn well when you're alone but like a complete jackass when another living being may be within a mile or two?
I would do just about anything for anyone i care about...and just as much for someone i've just met
for this reason I've been taken advantage of my whole life
the last people i expect it from are the ones whom i love most but for some reason they're the first to do it.
it makes you feel like everyone around you thinks you're dumb, like you're not capable of thinking for yourself, doing for yourself...so they do it for you
What if I told you that I know what you're thinking? like when you play these stupid little mind games and don't think I realize what you're trying to do
Like when I first met you...you told me exactly everything you thought I wanted to hear but only because I had explained to a room full of people what my perfect guy was while you sat there intently
And just because you prove a point in one way that doesn't mean it's proven the way it needs to be...but I'm too dumb to remember what we were first talking about or the whole point of the conversation
everyone needs to realize that unless you're a complete moron then you too can see things from different levels, different angles, analyze, criticize, anatomize
just because you think you're smarter than them doesn't mean you really are
when i was little my dad told me something that'll stick with me for a while
"the smarter you think you are, the less others believe you to be"
because of this I like to sit back and just listen, pass a judgement and move on...I don't feel the need to prove that I'm smarter or wittier...I'll never make you feel dumb or put down anything about you...take a lesson...remember how you've been treated...do it to someone else one day
don't make me feel bad for being nice...try it for yourself
as bad as someone can make me feel by taking advantage, I'll never feel like you may when you've hurt someone you love

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